Bubayees to My first job

 Well, today is my last day in the office.

All good things come to an end.

  

Seems like only yesterday that I started working here. I learned a lot  from my first job and there were a lot of people who made my short term enjoyable.This is dedicated to them all. I am sure that everyone who has worked somewhere before would identify with these characters.

First and foremost is the (miracle comic)

This is what he thinks of himself.(god's gift to women)

This is what he is.

This expression is a proof that he is around.

He tried to teach me the following things:

1)How to be a slacker.

2)How to bore someone to death.

3)How to make sure that Everyone you know, knows you are a wannabe who tries to be cool all the time.

4)How not to attract the opposite sex.

He is someone who strongly believes that he knows everything under the sun, and is always right about everything. Yes, the encyclopedia does not contain as much information as he does. Google calls him up for updates on technology and any new information. He has a very melodious voice and has mastered voice modulation . He  has an answer for everything and yes, I almost forgot he can even predict the future. His favorite song is "chacerron" , (tells you a lot about the  character himself).His favorite game is Gandhiji  ki dhoti main that he plays with members of the opposite sex.
Whenever I see him, the following lines come to mind

 " Sau  kos door jab koi baccha rota hai tab uski maa kehti hai , so jaa bacche warna yo baccha aake apne joke maarega"

"He is a virgin by choice, the girls choice."

"He is a miracle comic, whenever he is funny, it is a miracle."

"Does he ever have a bath?"

"There is something called as water and you can go near it, you do not have rabies,...  wait maybe you do? "

"jahan dikhi laundiya ,khelne laga dandiya"
 

On the positive side, he has helped me a lot and am thankful to him for that.

The second person is the person to watch out for. A closet Pakistani who is the epitome of patience,and a staunch supporter of a political party.He is always calm and composed and is in the good books of all his supervisors. On the bright side though, he is very helpful and hardworking and I hope that someday he gets the recognition that he deserves.

This is the expression on his face and everyone around him.

I met the third person by what I believe to be a stroke of luck. I met him thanks to the Duke of shine and am indebted to the Duke for that. Very few people that I met in the office actually had a sense of humor. He was one of them. Has a joke for every occasion,and has an uncanny ability to lighten up the mood (majority of the times by cracking a joke on someone else) but the best part is that it works. My first impression about him was that he is a workaholic and a very serious person. But once I got to know him, I realized he was fun to be with. Underneath the tough exterior is a genuine person. Very practical ,knows what he wants and gets it. His ability to crack good jokes on the fly is unparalleled. Hats off to you , man.
Known amongst his friends for giving apt nicknames:

Most dreaded line to all the fags around him.

Statutory warning: If you cannot laugh at yourself, do not hang around with him.

He is watching you.

Female Einstein (BOREKAR)
Yes, this one also worked with me  in the office.Someone who thinks too highly of herself. If there is someone who has a sense of humor worse than the miracle comic, it is her.The timing of her jokes is what makes it even more irritating. Her jokes make people like him look good. Looks perpetually bored, has a very monotonous voice (can put grown men to sleep )

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz 



HUH, where was I?

(sorry just writing about her made  me fall asleep) and tries to have the last word in everything .A very very boring  person with a superiority complex. Has a wrong impression that she is the best thing to have ever happened to the company. Sorry to burst your bubble, but the world does not revolve around you, as a matter of fact, even flies don't revolve around you. (All the flies are busy revolving around the miracle comic.)

I am back.

She has such an awesome personality that even an insanely funny film like Andaz Apna Apna becomes boring even if she just has a special appearance in it.Can dish out jokes but cannot take them.

I am sure she came up with the idea of naming that company.

Even statues get bored by listening to her.

On the flip side, was good to me and helped me a lot with my work, the sarcastic comments were not needed though.

The Rockstar
This guy is both unique as well as timeless.He is one of the few persons that I respect in the office. No bullshit and speaks to the point.Has a dry sense of humor and offers a patient listening to you when you are feeling down and out. Speaks little and only when necessary, but when he does speak, people listen to him.Has a great personality and I wish someday, just someday people would look up to me the same way I look up to him.I am sure that he will be very very successful and he will achieve all his dreams.

Just do your thing.

Jinxed
By far the most talented and hardworking of all the people, but this guy's luck is plain rotten .He seriously needs a divine intervention.The most technically sound person in the office. Has a great sense of humor and never stops trying. Is a perfectionist and excellent at his work.
A good example of what happens to him, would be:
He sells his plot of land to pay off his debts at half the price that he purchased it.The next day land prices increase by 300 percent.Or the new owner discovers an oil well underneath it.

Just hang in there, things can't get worse.

Look what fate has done to the poor guy, he used to be superman.

The Atheist
This guy is an atheist to the core.I even borrowed books on the subject from him.Very creative person who is full of surprises(good ones) and writes amazing articles on his blog.Thanks to him I attended a few concerts and had fun reading comics on the net.(hilarious comics).Had a great time working in the same office as he did.His knowledge on the subject (atheism) is really breathtaking.

Even I am an atheist, so.....

The Naturalist
One of my good friends who is not a conformist and treats people as they treat her.Independent , unique and lost in her thoughts, well known for losing her personal belongings too. Can be stubborn sometimes but hey, nobody's perfect.Reminds everyone of Ishaan Avasthi of Taare Zammen Par,

Just another day.

"Tu Dhoop Hain Jham Se Bikhar
Tu Hai Nadee O Bekhabar
Beh Chal Kahin Ud Chal Kahin
Dil Khush Jahan Teri Toh Manzil Hai Wahin"
On a serious note, could have easily been a naturalist as she is very knowledgeable when it comes to animals(their sounds, the texture of their skin ,etc etc).She reads a lot and knows about sensitive issues (naxalites) that nobody gives a second glance to.

Helping wildlife.

Helping domestic birds as well.

Does not care what the world thinks about her, and is not afraid to be herself.I feel honored to have met someone like her.

Walking aimlessly .

Oh, I am back again with my updated picture.(Miracle comic)

I lost my tooth, must get it fixed.

The Swan Princess
The Swan Princess is someone who is very passionate about dancing .She went for dance classes to the best dancer of our times:

Who can forget yaara o yaara?

But no, she did not go to him for dancing lessons.

Even he wasn't the chosen one to impart the dance lessons.

Neither Sanju baba nor WOW had the honor of training her.

100% Fag was her dance instructor.

When I first met her, I thought she was arrogant , then I realized she was actually a really good person, who is a bit racist (so am I, but more on that later).Never heard her about having a grudge on anyone.
Anyways, tends to fly off the handle sometimes, but like I said before, we all have flaws.Someone who is very honest about her feelings, very frank and does not bitch about you behind your back.Is very good at heart and is never jealous of her friends, on the contrary feels good if her friends do well.Tells you things on your face, no back biting or sugarcoating of words. She is very emotional but hides it behind the tough exterior she tries to portray. Very few people even understand her and tend to take her at face value. She is a chick in so many ways but then again can be all smart and reasonable when you need her the most. There are a lot of flaws that  can point out but all those are dwarfed by her good points. A great friend to have, one who you can call at 3 in the night for help and she will say ' Gaand maraa na' but then will help nonetheless. You have made office fun for me. 
Words learnt:
Guntud
Chodrex

Baa's wish finally fulfilled.

All right, sometimes unfortunate events like these happen but its OK if it happens to someone who deserves it.

Sweety

Well, words are failing me now , but the moments I spent sitting  next to her are priceless. I cannot remember a single day that would not be fun, all  thanks to her.Totally childish with a voice that can put Himesh Reshammiya to shame, and an incorrigible spirit.

 I will always remember the senseless jokes that she cracked.Someone who takes jokes sportingly (trust me it is difficult to find that in a chick) and can find humor in almost any situation. Lightens up the mood is any room just by her presence, and is way smarter than people give her credit for.Someone who is as insane as I am and has impeccable timing.I will miss the wacky moments and the dubbing of various artists done by her. I would like to wish her All the best in all her future endeavors.
Lines:
"Ek hockey doongi rakh ke"
"Ehhhh"
"Maine thodi bola ki conjuctivites hai, wo toh doctor ne bola"
"Bigg boss chahte hain ki..."

The Preacher
This guy practices what he preaches but nobody wants to listen to him. A ten minute ride in the auto-rickshaw and you feel like you have been to a spiritual gathering. A has been who talks non-stop about himself and all his life experiences. Loves to dispense advice when you do not ask for it and most of the times you feel that it would be better if he actually took the advice that he gave to others. People change their destinations if they come to know that he is going to the same place that they are going.
I tried to jump out of a moving train when I realized he was in the same compartment as I was. Thankfully, he did not see me.  

Yes that's him all right.

 Dude , get a life or at least get laid.



 Hanger(Winner of Biggest Loser Jeetega,literally)

Even this guy is healthier than he is.

 
 
Don't get me wrong, but this guy looks like a hangar whenever he wears a shirt(or wears anything as for that matter). Is known to give people headaches by talking. He is so weak that having two five rupee coins in his shirt pocket gives him a backache.His shoulders droop when he carries his own lunchbox.

Someone asked for their money from him.

 A total cheap-stake who only talks to you if he has a monetary gain.. A weak willed loser who gets the shit kicked out of him anywhere he goes.To top it all off, he thinks he is very smart and interesting.He believes he looks like a movie-star whenever he wears dark glasses.(see it to believe it)

This is not what he looks like.

Well, newsflash

This is what you actually look like.

I am back with my bluetooth.(Miracle comic)




My heartfelt thanks to all the people who made my stint at the office a memorable one.

The young Mavericks

This post is dedicated to the young mavericks who worked in my office.A footballing genius,The Duke of Shine, and of  course Movie Star, Hero, Superstar, Superman, and The Sarcasm King(All of them refer to the same person). Jokes apart, I got to learn a lot from all of them.So I would dedicate this blog to my awesome friends!!!!!

 

The picture says it all.

My friend, philosopher and guide.

I know everything, and my name is Always MR Right.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The footballing genius taught me to change things that I can and not to worry about things which were way beyond my control. He was the main reason that I stopped feeling sorry for myself. He spoke less but he had a way with his words. He always managed to get the message across. What would take someone many hours to explain would be done by him in a matter of seconds.And the best part was , he never made a big deal out of it. For him, it did not matter who you were or who you would become as long as you could get along and have fun. Irrespective of what he says, he always placed his friends over his job and money.

Famous lines:
 
" Arre paanch minute main pahunchta hoon, bas paanch minute. "

"Arre yahin aage hai."

"Chehra gulabi.... and  Gulabi aankhen jo teri dekhi sharabi ye dil ho gaya"



The Duke of Shine is actually the Duke of awesomeness. If you wanted to have a great time , all you needed to do was hang out with him.No matter what the situation is,  he always finds a way to infuse humor into it. If you are feeling down and out, he is the guy to hang out with, makes sure you have a smile on your face. Even the lamest of jokes become cool when he says it. I guess there are advantages to being a duke. Jack of all and the master of all. Never ,ever gets tensed, and even if he does it lasts for five minutes. I got a chance to look at things from a different perspective and thanks to him , I came to know who Bill Hicks and George Carlyn are. Helped me in realizing the importance of having an open mind .Biggest lesson that I learned from him is to know the people who are really important in your life and to know your own limitations before you heed anyone's advice. And yes, the harsh fact that  NOBODY gives a flying fuck about you.

Famous lines: 
"Fitting pe duniya kayam hai" 

 "kal aao"

 "Company ka director hai toh kya hua, Ramgopal Verma bhi director hai, Bindaas jaa" 

"Baa aur Bantai"

I know everything, and my name is always MR Right is , I hate to admit most of the times right.

He does shed tears at the drop of a hat, but that is because he actually cares. He is the youngest in the group and the most pampered of the lot, but this article is being written thanks to him. It is true that people who are younger than you are can teach you a lot.This guy is a perfect example of that. I was sure that the only way to be happy is to be free from all wishes. But thanks to this guy I realized that being free from all wishes is also a wish. If you always control yourself, and never let your true feelings show, or if there is no one in front of whom you can be yourself, you yourself don't know what you have turned into. I used to think that the only way by which I can always be happy  is by not allowing anything or anyone affect me. Being in a crowd or a party but not actually being there, as in physically I am here but mentally I am somewhere else. I am not living, I am just pretending or existing. And what is the point of living as if you are dead. Go out there, if you are hurt, it doesn't matter if you get hurt again. Just place yourself out there.The only thing that you'll regret is not having done that when you had the opportunity. Be yourself, and do not be afraid or embarrassed about it.

Famous lines:
"Love is not a feeling, it is an ability"

"Chandler Bing's lines" 


"Chinawale ko phone karke bol chinese leke aa"

"Haan haan bas haan ,very funny"


"Arre pammy tu sarcastic nahi, slapstick hai"


Moments cherished:

Trip to Lonavala

Eating a sandwich at subway with The DUKE and MR RIGHT

Watching a movie in drunken haze

The outings at Ambika and Poptates

Priceless moments outside HDFC

Well, I have nothing else to say , except am thankful that I  have you guys in my life.